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Dealing With The Dying And Death Of A Co-Worker

Prolonged illness followed by death is always a difficult time for people who are dealing with it directly. However, it can have a profound impact on casual friends and even co-workers as well. When a co-worker dies, especially a popular one, the whole dynamics of the office is affected by the loss. Productivity lowers and morale may also.

As someone who has spent hours each day with this co-worker, their loss may be a blow. This is especially true if you were friendly with them, sharing stories about family and even lunch time together. The question that is on many people's minds is what do you do when a co-worker dies, especially after a long illness like a battle with cancer?

When the co-worker is seriously ill (i.e. cancer) but can still get to work, respect their wishes and allow them the latitude to disclose what they feel is right. Offer your help to them in completing projects and such. If you are unsure about what to do, talk with your manager or supervisor to see what they feel might be appropriate.

If your co-worker has to take a leave of absence or is gone a lot from work, be prepared to shoulder some extra work to compensate. It is ok to feel a bit put out but realize that it is temporary and that you would want someone to help you should the roles be reversed. In addition, if you feel that you and your other co-workers may be shouldering too much of the workload, talk with your supervisor. Your job performance and that of others can affect your department and even raises or promotions.

Avoid trying to shy away from your ill co-worker. They are going through a lot and are dealing with similar reactions in other situations as well. Keep them in the loop on office goings-on and make sure they are invited to any social events. Give them the opportunity to accept if they are feeling up to it so they do not feel left out.

By the same token, keep in touch with your co-worker if they had to take a leave of absence. Keep them apprised of what is happening in the office so that they continue to feel a part of things. Be open and honest with them about your feelings of discomfort but your desire to keep them included. Ask them if they need any help or company, anything so that they do not feel isolated from work life.

If your co-worker should die, be prepared to feel grief and sadness. Share your feelings with co-workers and even the boss. Suggest putting together a memorial to present to the family or hold an honorary luncheon in their behalf. Take up collections to help ease the financial burden for the family. Talk with the deceased co-worker's family to offer your condolences and ask about the funeral. Offer your services to help seat guests at the funeral or writing thank-you's. Just let them know that you and the office care and are willing to do what is needed.

Finally, talk with your manager or supervisor if you notice that some people in the workplace are having trouble with their grief. Ask whether a counselor could be made available to help people through the loss of their friend and co-worker.